The thoughts behind today’s post come from two sources, my wife’s adventures in getting her doctorate and my mom’s memorial.
Sometimes people don’t listen. Sometimes people choose to ignore truth. They choose to ignore things that make their lives complicated, or mess with their perceptions. It’s annoying. It’s disheartening. But, what do you do?
Whether it’s a simple miscue, not hearing, inability to believe, or even willful ignoring: people don’t always hear what you’re telling them. Sometimes those people are people you need, they are people you value, and they’re not getting it. What do you do?
Well, first you need to do a little evaluating. You need to look at both ends and the middle.
You have to communicate to people in a way that they understand. That part is on your end (sorry, if your text was a couple of emoji’s and an acronym translated into middle French then written out in Norse runes I didn’t understand it).
Sometimes we need to find different ways to communicate our message. Sometimes there is a better time to communicate our messages (remember saying something really fast while your mom is in the middle of finishing something else so she can run off to an appointment is a way of making sure you told her without her understanding…).
It’s a simple process. Send your message. Figure out if it was received. And, if it wasn’t, find a way to send it better. Then, tell them again.
Sometimes the fault isn’t on our end. The people you’re trying to communicate with have lives; they have things on their minds; they have other things to hear and learn. You don’t have to nag or harass anyone, but be aware and when the time is right, tell them again.
Communicating isn’t easy. It takes effort.
Communication is necessary. You can’t live life completely alone.
Communication can be frustrating, but if you think and work at it, eventually they figured out what you’re trying to tell them.
Eventually the doctoral committee figures out that you actually found the right statistic. Eventually you find a time for the memorial that actually works for everyone. Eventually they do understand.
Don’t give up dear reader. Don’t just stubbornly keep trying things that aren’t working. Change your technique, but keep telling them. Eventually you get through.
That’s it for this one dear reader. Until next time…
Recognize your mistakes, but stand up when you’re right.