Ok, so, I’ve missed writing here for a few months… In that time I’ve celebrated Christmas, visited a lot of family, totally re done the system on my computer (OS and all), ended up with two new assistant clerks at church, and made progress on several projects (including reinventing one from the ground up). None of this actually excuses not writing here; the reality is I got out of the habit, and then got scared about trying to pick it up again.
It’s a fumy thing about habits. Some people feel that all habits are the same kind of self sustaining animal. But, good habits require maintenance while bad ones seem to take care of them selves (sort of like my garden… the ‘matos need to be looked after but the weeds do just fine without me). Also, good habits seem to be scary to try to pick up again when you stop. Bad habits (especially addictions) can be really scary to leave.
It helps to be aware of, evaluate, and manage all of our habits. A habit that some label as ‘good’ can be harmful, and one that they label as ‘bad’ could actually be helping you (if you’re gluten intolerant the ‘healthy’ habit of eating lots of grains could be poisoning you, on the other hand the ‘bad’ habit of leaving the TV on while I’m doing other stuff helps me focus (by the way who are ‘they’ and what business is it of theirs what our habits are?)). The point here is to evaluate all of your habits and really look at what they are doing for (and to) you; not just to stick them in piles labeled good and bad. Ask yourself: is this habit helping me to achieve what I want to do? If it is, keep doing it and ask yourself can I tweak it to help more? It the habit isn’t helping you, then it’s time to look at the advantages and costs of dropping the habit.
The classic “look at how much money you can save by not (insert appropriate: smoking, drinking, gaming, what ever)” comes to mind, but dollars aren’t the only way to measure a habit. the biggest benefit may be time, or psychological satisfaction/wellness, or something else.
Smokers sometimes get breaks that others don’t. That’s a time or psychological benefit, from a habit that also has a real health downside. Can you work breaks into your schedule without smoking? If it’s the break you want ,make that the habit and leave the smoking behind.
What we are talking about is being in control of yourself; not doing what others tell you. Make choices and take actions because it is what you feel is right and they support what you want to be and do.
This isn’t always easy (sometimes it’s downright scary). It is something that can benefit from the help of others (family, friends, counselors, life coaches, clergy, stray writers… (who or what ever you need as long as you stay away from the unknown ‘they’)). Just remember, no matter how much help you get, you have to do for your self. Those other people come in in helping you figure out what and how to change. They can also support you in doing the changing, but only you get to choose what you will do. That is for you to do and nobody gets to take that away from you.
As for me, I’m back now and this blog will be updated on a regular schedule again. I think it helps me, and you may find something that helps you.
One new wrinkle in this habit, I’m also starting a news letter that will be coming out once or twice a month. It will talk about the things I talk about here, but it will include more stuff that isn’t included here… There’s a sign up form here. I do intend the news letter to talk more about things that commenters/newsletter readers find interesting and important.
Till next week…
2015… Starting up again… Time for more fun!